I don’t believe in cheat days.
Goodness knows I’ve done my fair share of challenges in the past (paleo challenge, pescatarian challenge and shoot, I was a vegetarian for 5 years). I found them useful to experiment with my diet and learn what felt good for my body. I am not knocking dietary self-exploration, but I’m grateful that the days of constantly monitoring my diet are behind me.
Remember when healthy living blogging was largely composed of sharing what the person ate all day long? I know I blogged that way for a while. Then I hopped on the What I Ate Wednesday train. But have since fallen off of that too. While I used to be fascinated with what people ate all day long, it has mostly lost its appeal to me. I’m guessing it’s because now that I’ve found what makes me feel good, I’m less concerned with how others are eating (outside of my constant quest to find new recipes to try). I no longer feel the desire to emulate others because I know what works for one person, won’t necessarily work for another. Health is so personal.
Still, I’m pulling out visual food diary of what I ate on Tuesday to help illustrate why cheat days aren’t my jam anymore.
Breakfast
Two egg scramble with onions and mushroom, mixed baby greens with avocado and balsamic and grapefruit
The way I see it, in order to believe in a “cheat day,” you must therefore believe in non-cheat days. If a cheat day is a day where you let loose and eat what you want, then by definition a non-cheat day would be a day that you ate exactly what you “should” eat and not deviate. That definition borders on restrictive and I’ve learned over the years that I don’t do restrictive very well.
Lunch.
Red pepper turkey and chicken sausage with sauerkraut with mixed baby greens, cucumber, tomato and hemp seeds on the side.
I know that for me personally, my body has the most energy and feels the best when I focus largely on eating unprocessed foods. Vegetables, lean proteins, potatoes, grain/psuedograins like rice and quinoa, fruits, nuts, eggs, avocados, etc. Therefore, I focus on those. But if I were put a label on it, then sticking my hand into this bag a few times throughout the afternoon (which I did) would be considered cheating.
And cheating has a negative connotation. To me it says, you failed. And I don’t believe that a few handfuls of potato chips equals failure.
By focusing on eating what makes me feel good physically, but allowing myself to enjoy what makes me feel good mentally, I’ve taken all power away from food. And that is where I think the secret lies.
[Tweet “Why I Don’t Believe in Cheat Days from @ahealthyslice – an ode to #intuitiveating “]
When I restricted myself in the past, for whatever dietary experiment I was trying at the moment, I’d be ready to go all out on cheat day. I’d chow down on whatever forbidden food I couldn’t have and eat things I didn’t even want because I felt like I had to get it in on THAT day. If I didn’t have wine/pasta/chocolate/whatever on THAT day, then when would I get to have it again?
Have you ever felt like that?
Glass of pinot noir.
I think the secret to my version of healthy eating is actually counter intuitive. I spent so many years focused so intently on food when what I really needed to do was to take the focus off of it.
Dinner.
Marinated and baked chicken with roasted broccoli and cauliflower and smashed potatoes.
Once I stopped categorizing food into good and bad, my body was free to tell me what felt good and what didn’t. My mind felt free to really decide for itself what I wanted, and I was surprised to find out that I didn’t really want those “forbidden” foods as much as I had tricked it into thinking I did. My habits naturally aligned with the law of diminishing returns and I realized that a handful of chips or a few bites of chocolate actually satisfied me just fine.
Adora chocolate follow by a few spoonfuls of Ben & Jerry’s Milk and Cookies ice cream.
So maybe you can say I believe everyday is a cheat day? But I don’t really view it like that. Cheating implies shame and I have no shame calling myself a healthy living blogger while eating a handful jalapeno potato chips. Instead, I’ll call it moderation.
Healthy eating doesn’t mean perfection, restriction or guilt. It means fueling your body in a way that makes it feel good and helps you to further enjoy all life has to offer outside of food too.
Taking my health coach hat off now because I hear Kaitlyn is up. Mom hat time. But tell me,
How has your view of healthy eating evolved over the years?
Are you happy with your current relationship with food?
Jennifer says
Great post! I’m still trying to figure it out at the ripe as of almost 32 years old! I feel like I’m getting very close but I still have moments where I splurge on things that should be enjoyed in moderation. My willpower needs much work!
Jeannie says
Great post And I definitely agree. I do like to see your what I ate posts though for inspiration!
Kate says
Great post!! I don’t believe in cheat days either – the whole concept of framing a little indulgence as failing is completely inappropriate and unneccessary (in my point of view anyways).
I have followed quite a number of styles of eating. While all have had a positive influence on me, I no longer follow a particular diet. What I realized is I don’t need a diet to tell me to not eat something that I don’t enjoy and don’t feel good eating. Instead I eat according to my body’s rules.
John J. says
Ah, common sense and moderation. A novel concept! You live and preach it well. May the shame based “cheaters” develop a clear conscience.
Linda @ Running4two says
Thank you so much for posting about this. I have had a dangerous relationship with food in the past and I’m currently on the “I’m eating super healthy every week day and can “cheat” some on the weekends.” All this does is make me crave what I can’t have during the week and then if I do cave, I feel super bad about “cheating”. And the cheat days, you don’t even want to know how much I try to squeeze in since I know I can’t have if for x amount of time again. It’s just not a fun way to live. Thank you for reminding me of that. 🙂
jennifer says
This post makes me happy. It makes me realize how far I have come. I used to be a Monday diet person and by Thursday I was off of it and the weekend was on to the last supper before I start my diet again on Monday – I never really made any progress. Now I am more focused on eating what makes me feel good and powerfully, as you said. I have lost a ton of weight and people have been recently asking me what is the secret and its funny because there is no secret other than eating foods that really nourish you (I am a huge supporter of local food!) and eat until you feel satisfied and content – not to the point that you can’t move. I still have a little bit more work to do on myself but heck, I am happy. …Now if only I can have this mental shift with exercise! 🙂
Melissa says
I love the mentality of no cheating, but am definitely not putting that into practice. Intuitive eating doesn’t work for me at all and if I’m not tracking my food in some way, mentally I just don’t have enough awareness of what I’m eating and I always end up over eating. But even when I am tracking my food, treats are always involved. Any time I go cold turkey on some food group or dessert foods, it becomes the forbidden fruit for me that I can’t wait to get my hands on and just backfires.
I really want some more balance in my eating. I grew up being told that foods were good or bad though, and that’s been really hard to shake as an adult.
Kelli H (Made in Sonoma) says
I really have the same philosophy as you with food. I don’t believe in cheat days either! My only difference is I’ve found so many foods make me feel bad. I’ve been working on eliminating foods from my diets because I’ve had so many stomach issues for years. I’m sick of having intense stomach pains after eating certain foods. I’ve given up eggs, but now I added them back into my diet. So, I’m only eating an egg or 2 once a week. I’ve given up dairy for as long as possible because I always feel bad after eating cheese, ice cream, etc. I don’t want to say I’ve given it up forever because you can bet that some day when I’m on vacation I might give in and order something with cheese. I’ve also given up gluten for the next 3 months because I’m trying to work on my fertility and every doctor I’ve seen is suggesting that I try to give up gluten. Anyway, finding the right “diet” for someone is totally personal. I kind of hate having to “give up” all these foods but I’m also sick of feeling bad. I guess I don’t like how it sounds to say “Oh, I don’t eat gluten, dairy, and I’m trying to avoid soy”. I feel like people look at me like I’m so stupid. =/ But, I gotta get over what people think about how I’m eating and just know that the way I’m eating now makes me feel the best way possible.
Erin says
@Kelly H
Not sure if this makes you feel any better, but we have to avoid soy, wheat and dairy as well. Hubby has Hashimitos and food intolerances, and most of the time it’s just easier making it yourself! Please don’t be discouraged. I like to think how healthy we are eating instead of viewing it as restrictive. 😊
Kelli H (Made in Sonoma) says
Thanks, Erin! It always feels better knowing you’re not alone in something. 🙂
Catherine @ foodiecology says
This is so well-written, Brittany, and you’ve summed up my views perfectly!
I avoid using that terminology because, as you’ve said, it implies failure. And I believe that indulgences are as much a part of a healthy diet/lifestyle as salads and the more nutritious stuff.
We just give food too much damn power! It’s less exhausting to just eat how we feel like eating – primarily nutritious foods with treats when we want them – than to restrict and schedule it! Thanks for sharing. <3
Parita says
LOVE THIS POST SO MUCH! I could not agree with you more. In my early to mid-twenties, I had a very disordered relationship with food. Everything was about calories, balancing splurges, cheating on the weekends only, etc. I still get exhausted thinking about it. But now I really try to use my body’s signals to help guide my choices. Instead of thinking about when I last ate something bad or the amount of calories in every single meal, my mind is now freed up to think about what my body needs, how to make foods taste better, and how to enjoy the food I chose to eat. Thanks for this post!
Lauren @ Oh Hey! I Like That! says
I’ve really got to get the “cheat day” mentality out of my head. My goal is to just try to eat as best I can, but I’m constantly flip-flopping. My new goal is to be on a much healthier food plan (or just have a healthier relationship with food) after vacation.
Alyssa @ renaissancerunnergirl says
I agree 100% on feeling like when I’d be on restricted eating plans (which for me were mostly to do with an ED, so even worse) I would allow myself a cheat day and eat myself literally sick, until I was stuffed and nauseous, because I felt like I wouldn’t get the chance again. It’s so much better now to try and make sure I’m getting the nutrients I need as a runner, but to eat the darn cupcake if that’s what I want, even if it’s 10am and I already had breakfast (this may have just happened, five minutes ago). Otherwise I’ll keep eating until I go for the cupcake…
Heather says
Really good post! I’m not really that happy with my food relationship right now, and I think part of my problem is struggling to get my husband on board with healthy eating as well. We have too much junk in the house and I have so little self-control and feel defeated when I attempt to make really healthy meals and keep everyone balanced just to have my husband pull out a bag of junk food and he and my kids chow down. I think ultimately it needs to be more of a team effort to eat healthier because you’re absolutely right – when you eat well, you just feel so much better.
Cara says
Great post! Thank you for putting my thoughts into words. This is my view on healthful eating and something I have a hard time getting others to understand. I in the past have also experimented with various diets and restrictive patterns and have seen myself come a long way. I no longer focus on food or view it as the enemy, it just does not work for me. I do not like the “cheat day” mentality at all, it implies failure and just because you had a bit of indulgence one day does not mean you need to start all over. I eat healthfully most of the time but you better believe I’m having that glass of wine and some chocolate or a few handfuls of chips if I feel like it. You are so right in saying that what works for one person does not work for another, you need to listen to your body and do what feels good.
Erica says
I love this post so much! Your relationship with food seems to be in a really good place lately. I have recently come out of a pretty restrictive + bad body image place (related to work stress) and this is such a good thing to read – I’m trying to embrace intuitive eating and not having “bad foods” right now, and getting away from Very Strict Calorie Counting! It’s a process!
Erin says
I really loved and appreciate when you wrote, “By focusing on eating what makes me feel good physically, but allowing myself to enjoy what makes me feel good mentally, I’ve taken all power away from food. And that is where I think the secret lies.”
It’s so easy to let food have the power, like it owns us, or controls our thoughts and feelings, let alone our physical health. I really appreciate your outlook on food and dieting. I think it is really important to enjoy food, to enjoy our bodies, and not be obsessive about everything we eat, because that is not so enjoyable 😉
Rachelle says
Love this post! What a wonderful reminder to eat intuitvely and to never feel ashamed of “cheating” on your diet. I have always been a calorie counter because it helps me to keep my macros in check. And when I don’t count calories I tend to go over board with over indulging. I have never implemented cheat days because I know I would turn that into a cheat week then a cheat month lol.
AJ says
I never comment, but what a great post! Your style of eating is definitely something to aspire to. I hope you’ll do more like this in the future. I do love when you post your meals (or the girls’ meals!) because it is such great inspiration/ideas. And you plate food beautifully!
Jerrica says
You always seem to have impeccable timing. I needed this post so badly today. I have been trying desperately to lose 10 lbs that I gained while out with an injury. I have been doing my normal diet and cardio routine but it just isn’t budging. I decided last week to try the 21 day fix. So, 13 days into it and I broke down. I was so tired of eating off “the list”. I was hungry and tired all the time. I hated that I couldn’t have cheese and avocado in the same day. My meals were so bland and I loathed thinking about what I would have next. So I had some pizza with my family last night. It was a gorgeous night and we had just had a great time together at swim lessons. Afterward, the kids asked if we could go to the ice cream place next door and I just lost it. Because I can’t do that. I can’t have pizza and ice cream. I have to sub out my containers. But I had the ice cream. And the pizza. And I woke up this morning ready for that killer workout. And I am not a failure. So I am going to say goodbye to those containers. But I will keep on keeping on with those workouts!
Julia @ Lord Still Loves Me says
You have the exact mentality toward food and in general, holistic living, that I aspire to one day have. I continue to work on it, and posts like this serve as a wonderful reminder.
Kate says
I cringe at the term “cheat day.” But then again, I cringe at any unnecessary restriction. As someone who has been there. I feel like the amount of life missed out makes it completely not worth it.
For me also, the “what I eat” posts used to be a way for me to critique my diet, but now I just love them to find new ways to switch things up. Like those delicious smashed potatoes I’d like right now!
Amy says
Thank you for posting this. As a person who recovered from anorexia, I live by the idea of not having guilt about what I’ve eaten. So many bloggers write about “guilt free” or “indulgences” or “cheating” and I can’t stand it. I’m currently pregnant and I have to live by my cravings even more than usual!
Briana Lucas says
This post is exactly why you are in my top list of favorite healthy lifestyle bloggers. You are real, you are healthy, and you are inspiring. I follow other bloggers who have such an unhealthy approach to food that it makes me crazy, and I try to figure out how they are healthy bloggers to begin with. To me, I consider the folks who restrict and forbid certain foods to have an UNHEALTHY relationship with food. It should give you nourishment, it should make you feel good, but there are times it’s ok to eat because you just WANT to eat something, and that shouldn’t be to feeling like you “cheated” or that you ate “bad” Thank you for always being you 🙂
Laura @FitMamaLove says
I couldn’t love this post more! I live and eat by the same philosophy.
Nicole says
I knew I loved your blog, but this helps me pinpoint why! Thanks for being genuine, mature, and unabashedly focused on moderation. I can relate to your journey and changing beliefs and interests when it comes to all things food related. I will definitely keep reading and relating to you through your blog! Btw, I love meal plans much more than looking at everything you (or anyone else) ate all day!
Kerry says
Just what I needed to read today! Love your blog so much and I agree with your philosophy on food so much! Still working on getting to that place of freedom though!
Mona says
Really good post!
I don’t like the idea of cheat days – in the past it meant just eating anything, because I could and then it became filled with guilt.
My relationship with food has been complicated over the years, from not eating enough to then moving to the other extreme.
I think in the last couple of years I’ve slowly come to a better understanding of what I need. I wouldn’t say I’m there yet and 100% happy with my relationship with food, but certainly in a comfortable place.
Hilary says
I love this message! And I am totally with you, if you don’t restrict balance is possible and when you do I don’t believe it is!
Michael Johnson says
Wow, you and so many of your minion with eating disorders. At least some just come out and admit it.
Irina says
“If I didn’t have wine/pasta/chocolate/whatever on THAT day, then when would I get to have it again?”
This describes so much of what leads to binge behavior for me. #tooreal
Sarah @ BucketListTummy says
Love this post and I have a similar one coming up as well. As a dietitian, I really try to counsel my clients away from thinking about the notion of a cheat day – it’s wrong on so many levels. We shouldn’t need to have a day where we “deserve” food – that’s everyday.
Annette@FitnessPerks says
I love this so much! This is totally how I eat as well, and I’ve never been happier & healthier. I totally agree that I couldn’t care less what others are eating because I eat in a happy way now, not a restrictive/judgemental way. And what you mentioned about ‘cheat’ and good/bad foods is all totally psychological. As soon as we free ourselves from rules surrounding food, we can embrace what it means to literally eat what the body craves and trust ourselves completely when it comes to fuel. Love!
Allie says
Love this so much! Totally how I feel and so well explained. Have a great weekend! 🙂
Victoria says
Loved this post, couldn’t agree more! It is such a freeing feeling to put foods into “good” and “bad” categories!
John says
Thanks for the great post Brittany! I love your focus on eating more unprocessed foods. I agree that the word ‘cheat’, and the idea in general, gives the wrong impression. “Healthy eating doesn’t mean perfection.” So true! It’s important to build on wins and positivity. I like the saying that goes something like “the only person you have to be better than, is the one you were yesterday.”