Let’s sit down with a cup of whatever you’re drinking. For me lately, it’s been this combo:
That would be 1 tsp of matcha, 1 Tbsp of collagen, juice of half a lemon, and a solid squeeze of honey. It’s not going to thrill your taste buds, but it’s decent and has me feeling pretty energized and healthy in the mornings. Maybe it’s mental. Anyway, cheers!
If I’m being honest, I’m feeling quite scatterbrained. I’m actually not stressed or overwhelmed, but just feeling like I can’t get in a rhythm lately. Maybe it’s summer and if that’s the case, I hate to concentrate on it too much because the next month is going to be all over the place for our schedule as well with a few fun trips on the books. Still, for whatever reason I’m perturbed that I just can’t fit it all in.
If I’m being honest, I thought as we slowly moved out of the baby phase, I’d find myself with more time. HAHA. Though I can send the girls to play in the other room now with varying degrees of success, I find things overall are much busier than ever, even compared to 2 years ago when Kaitlyn was brand new. Our lives are very full (and very happy) right now; I just feel like I’m sitting back with all these puzzle pieces of life spread out before me, determined to find a way to make them fit seamlessly together.
Have you bought this reading book yet? It’s great!
Believe it or not, I’ve never felt the need to be the woman that can do it all. However I do struggle with the fact that I WANT to do it all. I want to invest quality time in my marriage. I want to be the one with my girls 99% of the time. I want to be household CEO and handle scheduling the plumber and stocking the fridge. I want to make all our meals. I want to give myself to this space. I want to feel strong and fit. I want to spend time with friends, laughing in ways that only other women understand.
Our group last night seeing Bad Moms with the cops that had to come kick out some moms that were a little too rowdy. The irony was not lost on us.
I want to plan for the future, but enjoy the now. I want to go visit family, but also find time to relax at home. I want to be mom, but want to explore my own personal growth and interests too.
If I’m being honest, the demands from society to take care of yourself juxtaposed to the message to soak up these fleeting years can be deafening. It’s a lot to juggle without feeling like you’re somehow screwing it all up.
Typing it all out sounds like the stereotypical struggle with finding balance. But if I’m being honest, I’m really not feeling overwhelmed, just perplexed. Things are falling through the cracks (emails, house maintenance, unanswered text messages, etc) and I think I finally know I’m at a crossroads where I have no choice but to learn to delegate.
Darn it.
If I’m being honest, I always hated group projects. I’d rather just do the whole thing myself. However, I can’t do that anymore. Something has got to give. But how do you order your priorities when you have 20 things crammed into the top 5 slots?
The girls with their new baby cousin who gave me a severe case of baby fever to boot.
I think I need to tune out the noise. I need to let go of the guilt. I need to let go of some of the control. I need to relax my innate need to please. I need to stop reading about what I need to do to be a good mom/run a successful blog/be healthy. I’m ready to figure out exactly what my balance looks like. Is it getting a one-day a week nanny? Is it blogging less/blogging more/blogging differently? Is it getting up earlier or sleeping in later?
I don’t know, but to start I’m taking away all the rules I have set up unnecessarily for myself. Though I’m someone that appreciates setting expectations and am committed to following through on my word, maybe it’s time for me to stop implementing all these self-imposed parameters. The world won’t stop if I skip a day of blogging. It also won’t stop if I blog everyday for a week about nothing more than how we’ve been wandering around Charlotte or what we ate for dinner.
I imagine it will also keep on turning if I’m a little behind on emails or if we eat grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner twice in one week.
If I’m being honest, I know this post is all over the place. And there is no grand point or epiphany here at the end either. I’m just sharing what is going through my overactive brain and saying I’m not sure what the answer is. Maybe next I’ll share some of my favorite parenting wisdom and make a beautiful pinterest-worthy image to go with it and implore you to share it. And then maybe I’ll show a blurry picture of our trip to Publix to check out their grand opening, gush over how excited I get by grocery stores, and then confess how I will write an entire post dedicated to how busy life is, but that I then spent 15 minutes of my “precious” time trying to learn what instagram stories are and why I don’t have them yet. (spoiler alert: I still don’t have them?)
Snapchat is the bomb
Anyway, if you’re still here reading this, thanks for following along life’s journey with me. It’s nice to sometimes use this space as a therapy session and appreciate your eyes/ears/thoughts.
Can anyone relate?
I hope you have a wonderful weekend!
Janna says
I can so relate! I just settled in to my desk at work with my coffee. I always check my emails and read several blogs first thing in the morning. It’s just a good way for me to ease into the day. But I am a first time mom, with a sweet little 5 month old, working full time, and striving to be the best mom I can be, a good employee, a supportive wife, and maintain my health and fitness. It is a lot to fit into the day. And I’m always trying to figure out what the perfect balance is.
Brandy H. says
Yes!!! I have been feeling the same way all week! My husband graduates in less than a yr. and I wonder if we will finally move? Or will we finally buy a bigger house that we desperately need? Should I work less to be with my kids? Or should I put my youngest in before school care a few days a wk so I can keep my hours at a job I really like? And the list goes on and on and on! But I too feel like no matter what we decide or what we do from day to day that It will all be ok! We will continue to truck along and the world won’t stop! Thank you for this post! I started reading your blog almost a year ago and I love it!
Kate says
Oh, I know exactly how you feel. I know I should delegate more – as a full-time working mom, everyone tells you that much. But I just find it so so hard.
In fact, I sent out a newsletter last weekend about the same question: everyone tells you to prioritize, but what do you do when you have to many things that are high priority? Your line is just so much better worded: “But how do you order your priorities when you have 20 things crammed into the top 5 slots?” Love it! It’s exactly how I feel.
Thanks for sharing, and I’m excited to see what solutions you come up with…
Have a great weekend!
Cornelle says
Wow, I think most moms feel like this if they honest ;-). There is just some much to keep up with these days. Makes me wish I lived in simpler times (sometimes!). So much info to read and keep on top of and so much to do and experience. And time is going by so fast!! I think this time of the year also contributes to this feeling – more than half the year is now gone and before you know it, it will be the mad dash towards the festive season again. How does one live purposefully in it all? I think that is the real question and challenge. Maybe we have too many priorities..eek!
Heather says
Definitely feel ya! Especially when it comes to prioritizing and just figuring it all out. It’s not easy to find a time and a place for everything. I’m finally starting to find a balance… sort of. I typically start to feel so overwhelmed that I get stuck in place, and then nothing gets done. I’m beginning to think I’m the sort of person who just needs to create a schedule and stick to it (but then to give myself some slack when things out of my control happen). I’m thinking that’s the only way I’ll be able to keep as many things on my plate as I want to until I can figure out what to let go. In time that might be my blog or it might be something else.
Have a great weekend!
Kathy says
Oh YES, I can relate!! And it will all be OK. Funny how we can be our own worst enemy by trying to do it all and wanting to do it all. Again, it will all be OK. Have a great weekend!!
Brittany Dixon says
I agree Kathy- it will all be ok! And it is ok. I’m constantly so grateful, just trying to keep up with those little tasks that keep slipping my mind. I’m such a scatterbrain lately! Have a great weekend 🙂
Kelli H (Made in Sonoma) says
Even though I’m not a mom I totally feel ya on what you wrote. Sometimes it scares me that I feel like that and I don’t have kids yet. Makes me wonder how I’ll juggle it all when we’re lucky enough to have kids. I think like you said, something has to give. Some things just have to take higher priority.
Regarding stories, did you do the update? Once I updated it showed up right away, though I haven’t watched one single story. I’m pretty much boycotting stories because it’s snapchat in Instagram and I love snapchat. Plus, I could see myself spending WAY too much time on instagram between the normal feed and now the stories feed. Plus, I’ve heard bloggers are just doubling up between posting the same things on snap and stories, which in my opinion is lame. I know there are different viewers on each platform but it’s so repetitive. Anyway, I’m just not a fan of stories. haha.
Jenn says
I agree!!! If I wanted stories I would go to snapchat!
Brittany Dixon says
I’ve checked on the update and I have nothing to update! I think I’m ok holding off though. I kind of like snapchat in its own world!
And as far as the struggle to juggle goes (which totally should have been my post title now that I’m thinking of it ;)), I certainly think it applies to all women, not just moms. We all like seem to take on things until we hit our max! Now if I could just figure out why…
Ashley says
I can relate! I told myself I would step back from blogging a little this August and savor the rest of summer. But I haven’t been savoring as much as intended. Maybe I need regular blogging to help balance? What did I mean by stepping back? Which tasks do I put off, which do I keep up? I spent the other night with friends seeing bad moms too and it was great but it’s normally my night to get work done, I didn’t feel stressed but instead a bit out of sorts. We have a puppy and she needs exercise, but this heat has been overwhelming for her & for us. In fact, I wonder if this weather we’ve been having is partly to blame for this funk — it was amazingly hot followed by wet, gray, and humid. I imagine crisp fall days will put a spring in our step and new purpose in our lives soon! as for August I think I’m going to declare it guilt free and ease up on everything too. Maybe that’s what I meant when I told myself to savor this time. Maybe it’s letting go of the rules and routines for a short while and just going with the flow.
Brittany Dixon says
I’m always down to put a little blame on the weather! The sticky humidity has run its course. Bring on a crisp fall day! Ok, maybe not quite yet, but soon! I hope you are able to kick back and enjoy August- sounds like you have a good non-plan/plan lined up 🙂
Cara says
I can say that this summer has felt that way for me too, more than ever. And I don’t even have kids, yet. There is simply too many things that I want to do and not nearly enough time in a day (or week) to get it all done. I’ve found prioritizing certain things one week and others the next helps keep some balance, but I still have that desire to stay on top of it all, always. I think for me an actual schedule would be key. From reading the comments and totally relating to them all, I think this is just something we are all trying to figure out in this day in age.
Brittany Dixon says
Thanks for your comment Cara! I actually love your idea of prioritizing things by week. It makes total sense and I think it would give me that flexibility I’m after. Thanks for the suggestion!
Morgan says
I love this post b/c it’s so honest.
I feel the same way most days.
I think women/moms are predisposed to want to do it all…with grace and perfectly I might add.
It’s ok to be honest and admit that you don’t have to and shouldn’t need to.
Thanks for sharing!
melissa says
what a honest and great post! Usually I read your posts and I think WOW how does she do it all, i guess it’s all relative 🙂 i agree best to not judge or compare, when possible. and please don’t do videos on instagram, it’s too hard to keep up with it all and I love your snapchat. happy friday!
Brittany Dixon says
Oh yes, I certainly do not do it all! Glad that charade is out of the way 😉 Yeah, I’m not wild about the idea of instagram stories, especially since I am so hooked on snapchat. It would be an uphill battle for instastories to win me over! Have a great weekend!!
Dorothy says
I feel the same way, Brittany! I’m a full-time working mom and had grand plans for my (Friday!!) work day and fun things (and personal development) for the weekend, but I’m currently sitting in my car with my 2 yo who is sick, and we’re waiting for his daddy who is in the chiro’s office because his back was hurting so badly he could barely walk. Have to plan out what we can to get the max out of time, but be ready to take things as they come, reflect and regroup! Great post!
Brittany Dixon says
I hope your son and husband feel better soon! Sick kiddos are tough, but I love how you seem to be taking it all in stride. I hope you still get a great weekend out of it!
Lauren C says
My favorite posts are what you ate/what you did in a day or weekend! Don’t sweat it! Life is too short!
Tanya says
I say start by being a “bad mom”. No more cooking breakfast lunch and dinner and those kids can potty train themselves and wipe their own butts. There that saves a heck of a lot of time 😉 I had fun with you last night. Thanks for coming with me!!
Julia @ Drops of Jules says
You do seem extremely busy according to snapchat, but it is a happy busy that makes me happy to peep in on through social media. You are one of the few people I always look to watch their social media! I think one of the aspects of your life I’ve always admired is how much effort you put into your relationship with David. I’m not married, but my life seems to point in that direction (so it seems!) and it’s been on my mind. I know most people aren’t the most efficient in creating that balance, but you handle it so well.
Sending love and thoughts your way! I’m a loyal reader and always will be, even with the scatterbrain. I actually love these posts, because I totally relate. Even when you’re stressed out though, you still inspire me, Brittany!
Lauren says
I feel like I could have written this to be honest, and I’ve been trying to figure it out as well. My kids are basically the same ages, we’re venturing into homeschool (I’m even using that same teaching reading book you are), and I feel settled and thankful I don’t have a newborn, but also more scatter brained than I thought I’d be at this age. I can’t put my finger on it either, which is weird. I think #momlife is like that though… we go through phases where we feel like we have it figured out and other phases where we’re off our game. I’m in the off my game phase now.
Erin says
You’re honesty is something I so love about this little space you’ve created. I can so relate to this. Although my kids are a little bit older – my oldest is seven – I am kind of freaking out a little bit about how we are going to fit in school and activities and life and everything else looming on the horizon. It seems overwhelming from the sense that there is more that we want to do than hours that are in the day. So how do you choose what to say no to? Thanks for putting this out there.
Carly says
I enjoyed reading this. I always look for your dad’s comment so I hope he comments on this one. He should do a guest post – he seems very wise!
John J. says
Your “therapy session” invites all to examine their daily existence – form and substance. “The unexamined life is not worth living” Socrates
Sarah says
I think this is a constant struggle for most moms, although sometimes it feels like you are the only one. Thank you for sharing and know that you are not alone! I find that my priorities are ever-changing, and it’s hard to figure out where I should place my focus – just like you said. I have had this exact same conversation with myself. It’s crazy how isolating motherhood can feel at times. If we would just open up to each other like this more often, we would probably find we are all going through the exact same thing!
Dana says
Wow! I can so relate to this post! Scatterbrained?? Exactly how I feel…..Just cant seem to put my finger on it. Its so nice to see many others going through the same thing right now. Finding a balance is key I guess but what do you put first?? Love hearing everyone’s thoughts on this. Love your posts and your honesty!
Sarah says
Thank you for sharing this. It reads a bit like my brain. It’s hard to process all the thoughts and hopes we have and then realise time is whizzing by.
We’re in the midst of a cold winter and the weather is finally helping me have some perspective on what we do or don’t do. Bike riding on slippery paths will have to wait, but sitting in and reading books is a good thing.
And I too remind myself , it will be okay!
Kristin says
Thank you for your honesty! I think it’s clear by the number of responses you’ve gotten that you’re not alone in your thoughts. Sometimes all the mom-centric articles are nice to read (especially when they make you feel like “oh my gosh, me too! I’m not alone!”) but often, they just serve to distract and make you feel less than you should. Of course we want to do all the things and be everything to everyone! It’s a mom thing, I swear 🙂
Just do what works from you day to day. Each season will bring new changes, and you’ll tackle those as they come. Maybe each week set a goal of 3 big things out of your list that you want to focus on, and then do those things and change it up the next week. If you set those goals, you’ll feel like you’re accomplishing something instead of feeling like you’re not getting things done.
And as far as Instagram stories, you’re not missing anything!
Brittany @ Delights and Delectables says
FRIEND… I feel you. 1. Why can’ t we live closer? 2. Yes. I feel like I want to DO IT ALL, but be at home. I want to invest in my children, take care of my home, and yet… work? I have realized I am going insane. So, I’ve let my blog pretty much go… I don’t want to. I have post aching to be written. But, do I sacrifice sleep? Do I blog while my kids play without me? Oh the mom guilt… But then again, some time away is good for me and them both. It’s just so hard…
Brittany Dixon says
1. Coming to the CLT area anytime soon?! 🙂 But yes, the struggle is real. Grateful to have so many good things competing for my attention, but it certainly can feel overwhelming. It helps to hear I’m not alone!