Yesterday was co-op day. Wednesday really is the perfect day for it because by the time it rolls around, we’re ready for a mid-week shake up. The kids are really enjoying it, and I am, too. Not only am I remembering my Spanish skills (I’m the assistant in the class), it’s a fun hang out with friends.

I try to pull myself together a little bit on those days, but yesterday I picked out a shirt that struck a chord with Kaitlyn. She walked in and said “wow! Is that new? You look fashionable! I’ll pick out your shoes!.”

I don’t know where she got it (certainly not from David and me), but this girl loves clothes and make-up. She’ll also deck someone in Tae Kwon Do, so it’s a nice balance in my mind.

To be clear, she did not pick out the shoes I ended up going with. I’m 38 now and need support and so my Naots won. I really want to get a pair of their booties for winter. They may not be fashionable by some definitions but they are seriously the most comfortable shoe ever.

Anyway, I finished packing their lunches while they ate breakfast. I’ve used my bread machine to make 2 loaves of bread in the past week and it has me searching for a countertop mill to grind my own flour. Half kidding. Kind of serious. Food prices going up and all…

The bread is so soft and the kids love it. I’m definitely a Dave’s Killer Bread fan usually, but the homemade stuff is quite the treat!

Those are mini mozzarella balls, not marshmallows.

Anyway, co-op went well. We stayed after to eat lunch and let the kids all run together. They created a magic club for potion maker enthusiasts. If you have kids that love potion stuff, too, I highly recommend this National Geo set. Both girls LOVED it. I’m working on holiday gift guides to share soon with the girls’ favorite things.

We got home and the girls practiced piano, Hailey finished up her final draft of her King Midas Paper, and I read my book and prepped dinner (just baked sweet potatoes since the pulled pork was already in the slow cooker).

At 4:45 David grabbed the girls and they took off for the soccer fields. On Wednesdays they have back to back practices and since we don’t live close to the field, David takes them both and I’m left with three hours to myself.

When they started a few weeks ago it made it blaringly obvious how rarely I am home alone. Like, never. It’s a strange feeling and one I’m trying to figure out how to best use. Last week I did the meal planning and grocery shopping, but this week I wanted to use it for something rejuvenating.

I considered working out but my legs and chest are so sore from the previous three days’ workouts. I knew I didn’t want to scroll my phone and I wasn’t in the mood to read. Of course a long list of things I could (should?) be doing raced through my mind. Old efficiency rearing its head. So, I started checking them off.

I shipped some items I had sold on Kidizen. I did a load of laundry. I cleaned and swept the kitchen. Then I knew I had a bunch of emails to get to, so I grabbed my computer and decided to “treat myself” by working on the computer from the couch instead of the office.

It dawned on me then that I’m really not that good at chilling out and just being.

So, to shake things up I figured I’d turn on a show. I remembered a friend telling me she watched Gilmore Girls every fall and since it’s a show I’ve never seen more than an episode of, I turned it on to watch while I answered emails.

Have you gone back to watch a show from 20 years ago? It’s crazy because it seems to move so slowly compared to shows today and the constant swiping of short form content like IG and Tiktok. And it was LOVELY.

So I kicked my feet up, watched two episodes, and got through most of my emails. By the time my crew got home, I actually felt mentally relaxed (compared to when I scroll and am entertained, but it doesn’t leave me feeling rested). See also: How to Stop Emotional Numbing and Be More Present in Your Life

I sat with the family while they ate and felt mentally clear and present. We got into sharing riddles and they got to bed later than they should have but oh well. That’s the good stuff, you know?

Anyway it was so funny to me to observe that when I find myself with rare “free time” that my first instinct is “how productive I can be?!” Does anyone else have that tendency? And if you’re good at relaxing, what do you like to do during that time?

We all know by now that the to do list will always have something on it. How can we be sure we’re being responsible and getting the necessary stuff done while also embracing how important rest, play, and relaxation are as well?

It’s a balance I’m clearly still working on, but my Wednesday night felt like a win.

More presence and patience? I think so. Less after co-op when we all retreated to recharge, but very much so at dinner.

More time outside? Nope. I blame the rain. But I did sit on the porch chatting with David as it was pouring before they left for soccer.

Less phone? None? No. Less? Yes.

Read a novel? I did; about halfway through The Room on Rue Amelie.

Less alcohol? I considered, but really just wanted something to sip on so I made tea instead.

Meditate? I did not. I thought I could wait to do it in the afternoon, but lesson learned. If I don’t do it in the morning, it’s not likely to happen.

Tracking grocery budget? No money spent, but we’re getting close to the fridge being empty, so time to meal plan!